My life goes on, but not the same...

We are giving friendship a try. I miss him. But I know that it is right. I know that we simply do not fit.

Even though this is the right thing, I still need time, it is the only thing that will help my broken heart heal.

In the process I forgot that I was just as good as him. I was turning to stone and losing my faith. That is why I needed to end it.
But he was kind, he was sweet. He was patient.

But we both agreed that we are looking for different things, and we really weren't working out.

My life goes on, but not the same...

Drifting

Last night I went out and had an emotional affair. It was nice being the center of his attention. It was fun being something he couldn't get enough of. I liked the complements finally being returned.

do you believe in love at first sight?

I don't. I know it's an illusion as Madonna says. I don't even think I beleive in love after a few months. Today I felt like I was not really a major part of his life. I thought that if I broke it off completely that he wouldn't care and may be releived that the thorn in his side is finally gone.

I wish he'd give me some indication that he'd like me to stay.

I know that the time draws near that if he doesn't do something more, I am going to have to end it. I can't pretend to like what's going on between us for much longer.

I recently hung out with some great friends... kinda my possie if you will.


Good times with good friends.

it's been a long time

I have not forgotten you my blog. I just started another that I seem to connect with better. Aren't blogs about the person who is writing them? When does it convert to a readers' blog? When there are ads and sponsorship?

Dooce.com just published a lot of emails full of hate about her site. I thought it was her site and it would evolve with her. I know that I feel like (be it ever so little) my writing has changed. If those readers don't like her blog they ought to move along. I don't read it daily and sometimes I find I'm not too inerested into the subject matter but usually check it in a few days to see what's happened and find there are at least a few posts I really like...

Anyway I think I'm just up set that in all facets... there are always a few people who demand to be entertained, like she is a trained monkey and forget that the writer is a complex human being, just a small, small fraction of her life and personality is portrayed online. At least I know that online I come across as totally insecure and my heart on my sleeve, but mostly isn't me, and sometimes is true, like when I'm writing something on here.