From what the Dr. says, I have an inflamed sciatic nerve. So now I'm on 550mg of naproxen bid, and tramadol prn. The tramadol is fun.

But also, I cannot go to the gym, or run. Maybe swim. He says let the pain be my guide... what's that pain? I need a bag of cookies and an old Betty Davis movie? Ok.(I wish)

So I told myself that since I can't do much exercise, I will begin to eat properly. Once and for all. And thus, in these two weeks, I will have laid the foundation for healthier eating, and be closer to being healthy and physically fit and begin working out again already with good eating habits in place.

(this is my before picture) (lol... riiiight...)

As of right now, I don't have the internet at my house, I hate it. But so far I'm managing to stay alive. I'm back at school, and this is (finally) the last year! And there are soo many cute guys on campus this year. Since it's my last I think I'm going to try and be a little more brave this year... what are they going to do, beat me up? ;)

Downtown Lights

Over a bottle of wine on a Monday night. We talked of foreign cities and dancing till dawn. You showed me pictures of your recent travels and I told you of my classes, and all the new information.
I tried to tell you of the ways my heart tends to wander. I don't love you anymore, but I hold you very dear in my heart.
A common friend, new to the group, the group formed as I stood on the sidelines hoping to be called over, this friend who stole my heart. He used words to barter for my emotions. But his actions were all pointing down a dead end street. You liked him, but didn't want his heart, carnal was on your plate only.
He and you. He and you. You didn't do anything. You two are still strangers. But I see the ground work being laid for the future. I'm not stupid and I can read certain signs. I know when you two run off on your drug-induced cruise, I know when you two are no longer bound by the ropes I've tied around you, I haven't tied nor ever wanted you to feel bound, but you two have unspoken emotions, emotions that stop before the world of emotion. Physical.
I might be jealous, I might be insecure.
I guess the dice have been thrown, though it's hurting me. Now it's history.

The winner takes it all, the loser standing small.

aww...

aww...
Originally uploaded by rkf524

This was a good night out... kinda like a farewell for me. I think that once these dog days of summer draw to a close, I might go into hibernation for a time. Not sure of the details, but I feel like I need to drop out of sight, then later, maybe 2,3,6 months, I'll come back.