so many thoughts

So when you find someone that you seem to really like, and yet you don't let yourself really ever like them. It just makes sense that it will never happen, so why even put forth the energy? Especially when 1500 miles are involved. That's a no-brainer.

I met a friend for brunch this morning. The weather was warm, yet cool in the shade. The sky was a friendly blue with wisps of white clouds. The hills on the horizon were beautiful despite the brown. Living in the desert can be wonderful at times.
The energy in the cafe was lively. It seemed to make even biochemistry somewhat interesting. I watched the people through biochemistry text until I saw a familiar outline in line. They didn't have pancakes. They are always out of pancakes. But the quiche was really good.
But the conversation was beautiful. We let words weave tapestries that mused of the good times we shared. We colored on a canvas of memory, and speculated with sound.
I feel so good around her. She believes in me. I never feel I have anything to prove or am being compared to others. Friendship is unique between every individual. It is impossible to feel a friendship for one person and feel the exact same for another. There are so many differences in my relations with others.
I ask about her life. She tells me all is good. I know there is a hard shell that conceals much. But I know it is not my place to get under. I know that I must be allowed in. I have seen glimpses and pieces of what lies beneath. A soul as infinite as the distance starlight travels.

So did you tell them? How do you feel? How did they react? Did you or didn't you? Gosh I wish you the best. But they are his parents and he said that they would still love him. I don't see them as getting the least upset. But I only know them through few pictures and some words. He always speaks so highly of them. I just want to hear your story when you want to tell me. But if you don't tell me, like tomorrow if you did or not, I'll call. ;)

I still think that it would be impossible for us to work out. But I am allowing myself to just live in a world of fantasy for now. Right now we will live happily ever after.