I'd take two if I was you

My thoughts are going 278km in every direction. They aren’t making any sense. I am feeling so much one minute and then utter emptiness another.

I think he’s losing interest. But then he seems to still talk about a future. It seems that an energy is lacking in his words. A comfort or certainty lost. But I cast it from my mind. I can’t worry about fairytales.

Will it be fun? I know I have a past, and it’s something I’m not proud of. It makes my heart ache when people bring up my not-so-great past. I try and put a fake smile on. But it hurts all the same. I know they don’t mean to rub my face in the mud, but that’s how I feel. It’s my won guilt from the game that I lost.

I’m learning that it’s the differences in people that make them great. I’m learning how to understand that people show their affection in different ways. No one else out there is going to show attention or affection in the way that I do.

I feel silly when left wishing you would take more time to communicate with me. The miles to go before we meet are each a hindrance. I’m down to be open, but sometimes I’m just down.

What do you have to say Frou Frou? “It’s your life, but you’ve only got one.”

I have to respect it is yours. But don’t keep me on the periphery for long. I’m a central kinda guy. I am your center since I make you mine. I won’t rotate around anything else. Once you commit yourself to me and me to you, I am your family. I come first. I can not survive any other way and I won’t settle.

Last night the darts were fun. I think that with a few more years practice I should be decent. The hot tub ran a little long. I didn’t have the excitement of new interest energy to propel me on. Soft bed never felt so good. But I had to leave my cares and worries on the floor last night. I knew they would be there when I got up. But when in bed I needed a quiet head.

Having my shirts cleaned and pressed and starched for me is the best things EVER!!

When I talk to an rph she makes me all flustered and that twittery feeling. She’s married. Has a child. I’m gay. She’s not. I have a crush on her.