I'm listening to ATB "I wanna cry." That song seems to fit my moods more often than not. Not because I want to cry, but because it puts me in a pensive mood. When I analyze my life and where I've been and where I'm going.
I told my mom I'm not an active Mormon anymore and she cried. I felt bad. Nobody likes it when their mom cries. But I'm still resolved in my decision. She told me that no matter what she is my mom and she will always love me.
I wavered some on the boy. But once again I'm firm in my knowledge that trying to get close to him is like opening up a pretty package of poison. I'll get hurt in the end. A little bit of me got really attached to him where I remember him often throughout the day but don't feel any real pain. Mostly I wonder what we could have been, and it's kinda too bad because we could have had much more fun.
I'm really busy with school. I'm trying to learn French again and it's totally kicking my butt, but I'm going to do it.
I saw today that last week over 100 people (okay like 102) visited my site. I once again wondered who would want to read the ramblings of a nut. But then saw that the average time spend in the site was 7 seconds. LOL. Long enough for some poor soul to realize where he/she is and move on... ;)
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