A Petal that isn't Torn

I've been thinking that there's a lot that I need to drop from my life. I need to let go of a lot. Still.
I feel that I have made much progress, but it's still so easy to fall into the same habits and the same ruts. I've fought to be so strong, and move beyond my hang-ups. But I still fall.
Sometimes I go to a secret garden, a place that I can be where there is no bad and all the crazy thoughts in my head are normal. But I'm still thirsty to understand life, and my yearning for knowledge increases.
I've become very picky about lovers. I don't want just anyone. I'm happy to be alone, and can wait forever because I don't want to settle.