My head is cloudy from grey thoughts. I can't seem to process anything much beyond the basic survial necessities. All I can seem to briefly focus on is a passing thought: Have I accepted that we are just friends.
Turbulent winds bluster within my soul. I want to reach out to him, I want to take his head in my hands, I want to kiss his eyes, I want to sing him to sleep.

My exterior remains placid as a pool in the July afternoon. But I am caught by the undertow. Within I claw for solid ground. I can't feel anything but his absence, and the storm thereof. And I'm sure I am nothing to him, but a friend. When will I accept our beautiful, innocent frinedship.

My mind has split into 1000 pieces. Not enough strength to fully formulate any thought. My heart is numb. Only divinity or death can realease me from this tumultuous pain.

But I know I will survive, if only by the memory that for a few sacred seconds I was yours and you were mine.