I figured it out.

I now know why I'm dragging my feet. The magic isn't there. I do feel an attraction, but birds don't chirp when he's around and bells don't ring. I don't feel that for anyone right now. At all.

But now this is where I falter in my judgement. Do I wait around and see if things change? Will I be leading him on if I do that? He knows that I'm not ready to settle down. I just don't want to be in constant contact with him right now. I need a few days off.

I need a few days off, again, from all people. And I think that the trip to Prescott may be just what I need. I think that I will definitely go. And if my mother wants me to go to the full three hours of church I'll do it. I'll just bring my ipod. ;-) C, you can come and go as you please.
The more I think about it, the more I like the idea of isolation from my life here in Phoenix. Just a few days off... nice.

But I want a resolution. I need a resolution.

Right now I'm tired and my brain hurts from this. So I'm going to just let things happen. If I don't feel it, I don't feel it. If I do, then I do.

It is what it is. Come what may.