Monday, November 21, 2005

Thinking straight

My mind kicks into overdrive to reason craziness. I don’t like it. I don’t like having to fight myself.
I don’t like being clingy-obsessive.
I don’t like needing you here now. I want you to have your space and time to breathe and think.
I wish I wanted that too.
I wish I didn’t think you were lying. I know you’re telling me the truth I need to hear.
Why do I doubt you? I doubt everyone I’m interested in.
No matter who,
I doubt you tell me the truth.
I try not to lie and I don’t. Truth is all I try to say.

I’ve got it bad for you. What’s best for me is to be alone for a time and learn silence, internally.

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Bury my heart in my controlling mind. Mindset of single and ever more. Focus on school. Sorrow is ever a guest in my soul. You only meant well. It’s all for the best, but you decided that on your own.

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